I watched a man talk about the role he plays as a father. He said he works all day and then is expected to be at all the games, and not just all the games but he is expected to be at the practices too. Then he is expected to clean the kitchen when he gets home because his wife also works. He kept saying he was “expected to”. I thought, you shouldn’t feel expected to do those things, you should want to do them, you should want to be at practice and the games. That is what being a dad is. After further thought I realized its not what being a dad used to be. Being a dad used to mean making sure other animals didn’t eat your family, and that your family was feed and didn’t starve to death so they could carry on the species. Now a father is expected to work a job (and it seems like every job is stressful these days), plus worry about paying for a house in a good neighborhood, paying for his kid’s college education, and keeping his daughter off the stripper pole. The role of father has become infinitely more complicated and our brains aren’t designed for it, they are designed for protect and feed. Our brains are malfunctioning, “I’m expected to” is a brain malfunction, you feel expected to because your brain is saying, “we’re just supposed to feed them and make sure they don’t die, what the fuck is all this other stuff?”
I say this all from the point of view of single man with no children observing from the outside, but I have to say… I think I would rather go try to kill something for dinner.
